I facilitate a bereavement support group in a county hospital. A group of eight to ten people gather every week to talk about their grief and loss, to offer support to each other and get support in that process. One theme that runs through our meetings is the idea that our loved ones have not "gone anywhere" but that they are still with us not "in spirit" but "as spirits". There is a big difference. "Present in spirit" means mostly as a memory. But "as spirits" means an "active presence" not tangible to touch or visible to the eye but tangible to the soul. Most participants are open to this idea, but there are skeptics too. One such skeptic was Andrea who had lost her mother on March 17, 2009.
During our meeting on November 30, 2009, Andrea came in with an envelope in her hand and asked me to open and read the card in it. It was a wedding anniversary card from her mother that had arrived in the mail, on Saturday, November 28, 2009, for Andrea and her husband. And it said: Dear Andrea and Lee, Happy anniversary, mom and dad."
November 30th is their wedding anniversary!
Andrea said that she had received anniversary cards from her mom and dad, every year since her marriage. She was sad that she won't receive one this year as her mother had passed in March. But she did!It was signed by her mom and the address on the envelope was also written by her mom!
The envelope was POST MARKED November 27, 2008! Where was that card for a whole year? Why was it not delivered the day after it was posted? Why didn't it show up six months earlier or six months later? Whey was it not lost permanently? Why would it arrive on the exact weekend of her anniversary? I told Andrea that it was her mother wishing her a happy anniversary. Andrea began to cry. She said she cried for hours when she received the card on Saturday and was confused, mesmerized, and mystified by the continued presence of her mom with her. She is now convinced that her mom is around her.
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